It seems like every day we read another story destined to
divide. Gun control. Abortion. Bank Regulation. Net Neutrality. Right now, it’s
immigration. Whether Fox News or CNN is your source for current events, you
cannot escape the current vortex that is forming around the immigration crisis.
Yet for all the points and counterpoints, the shouting,
yelling, name-calling, and promises to fix the broken system, the immigration
crisis has actually highlighted a much greater predicament in American life in
2018 – the death of empathy. The Golden Rule in our age of social media,
selfies, and constant self-promotion has morphed from “treat others like you
want to be treated,” to simply “treat yourself.” And behind every major
political fight lies a simple, obvious truth that nobody seems to realize – we
have lost our ability to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes.
We see the need for this everywhere – seminars, classes,
books, and trainings abound on people skills. I recently took a 2.5 day
training for my job as a supervisor – while there was some good practical tips,
the majority of the 20 hour training could be boiled down to this: “don’t be
jerk, try to understand where you employees are coming from.” Not rocket
science, but necessary.
We don’t really know how to be aware of others anymore. This
week, as a nation we celebrated the rescue of a dozen young men from a cave in
Thailand. We have compassion and empathy for people “over there.” But right
down the street or in some cases, a half a mile across the border, our empathy
sours into distrust and fear of outsiders or fellow citizens.
Conservatives and the Death of Empathy
While I grew up in a conservative environment, and am in
many ways more conservative than progressive, nothing has been more
stomach-churning in the news to me lately than the Republican response to
immigration. It seems like every week a new video of an American, typically of
European ancestry, berating a person of minority status emerges. In some cases,
the victims are in fact immigrants, legal or illegal, and in others they are
actually U.S. citizens. Regardless of their citizenship, the aggressors in
these stories belittle and demean people, often solely based upon assumptions
about their immigration status.
But when did being a Republican, or just conservative
politically, suddenly mean we are afraid of others? When did it mean that I
could care so profoundly about 12 boys trapped in a cave across the globe, but
not give a rip about the mother trying to escape gang violence, drugs, or an
unhealthy nation that has seen two high level government officials assassinated
in the last week? How is she different than those boys?
Moreover, what fuels some people into being publicly
dismissive and angry at non-white immigrants, legal or otherwise? Is it some
kind of historical amnesia? Have we forgotten that were it not for the risk,
trial, and bravery of our European ancestors who came here so many years ago
that we too could find ourselves so desperately on the outside?
At its core, much of current conservative immigration policy
seems to boil down to: “We got here first. Finders, Keepers.”
Liberals and the Death of Empathy
While conservatives seem to have lost their empathy for others,
the liberal, generally Democratic, perspective has lost empathy for its own
self. Compassionate and understanding of the weak, the downtrodden, the
oppressed, both near and far, the liberal view has forgotten how to care for
its own citizens.
Is it truly empathetic to construct a system that welcomes
all but can’t pay for anyone? Is it empathetic to offer a wink and chuckle to
illegal immigrants while others seek citizenship through years of waiting,
testing, and wondering if they will be allowed to remain in the nation they
have learned to call home? Is it empathetic to be so concerned about “the
others” outside banging on the gates that we forget to tend to the very real
concerns of our own people? How are they going to pay their bills, fund welfare
programs, and remain safe in an increasingly violent and chaotic nation and
world?
In a nutshell, the Democratic position can be summarized as:
“We had it first. We’re sorry, please take it,” with little regard to those
being asked to give more and more and more. We rob Peter to pay Paul, and don’t
even have the decency to say thank you.
No Way Forward
At the center of most political fights you will find this
lack of empathy. Gun Control? Conservatives shout and clamor for actual victims
of gun violence to pipe down even though they just saw their friends murdered
in 2nd period algebra. Abortion? Liberals champion that a woman’s
right is all that matters, even though life, or potential life, is extremely
precious in an age of death, suicide, and despair. Welfare? Many Republicans
believe that anyone under the age of 65 on welfare is lazy and faking a
disability, despite the fact that some people have crippling mental and
physical challenges and no other system to support or advocate for them.
Our country, our relationships with “the others,” whether
Democrats or Republicans, will continue to be plagued. There is no breaking
this logjam without first resolving our obsession with self-preservation to the
exclusion of caring for others. As C.S. Lewis once wrote:
“Progress means getting nearer to
the place you want to be. And if you have taken a wrong turn, then to go
forward does not get you any nearer. If you are on the wrong road, progress
means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road…a sum can be put
right: but only by going back till you find the error and working it afresh
from that point, never by simply going on.”
So it is in our current age. There is no going forward. The
path ahead is marked only by further arguments and discord. The only true
progress to be made lies in turning back, learning once again how to hear,
understand, and feel the victories and sorrows of others, and move forward
together from there.
I have no suggestions for solving our current immigration
crisis. That is for greater, more technical minds to solve and parse out. But
the only true way forward lies with a resurrection of our empathy. Until then,
we will remain embattled. After all, some 2,000 years ago, the apostle Paul
wrote, “Three things will last forever – faith, hope, and love – and the
greatest of these is love,” (1 Cor. 13:13, NLT). While love is many things
beyond just empathy, it is not less. Without empathy for our fellow citizens
and for those seeking to become our neighbors, there is no way forward.
